Cable TV: An Adult Rite of Passage

A couple months ago, I switched up my nine to five situation and accepted a position with a new company.  I have been immensely pleased with my decision thus far – the people are great, the opportunities are plentiful, and the beer is free.  All in all, a win-win!

On top of the aforementioned benefits of my new professional adventure, I was also pleased to learn that a fairly significant pay increase was included.  I wasn’t exactly struggling previously, but now I actually had the amount of disposable income that allows one to branch out into uncharted amenity territories.  My boyfriend and I knew exactly what to do next: we needed to get cable.

Cody and I are avid TV watchers.  “Avid” may actually be an understatement.  Instead of going out to bars on the weekend, we rent horror movies on iTunes.  Instead of going outside like normal people, we stay in and binge watch entire seasons of The Walking Dead in one sitting.  We are unhealthy people, but we’ve accepted it.

We finally called Time Warner to schedule the installation and used this milestone as our sole motivation for carrying on.  If I was having a bad day, Cody would comfort me with a “but baby, we’re getting cable in two days!!!” and then all of my worries would temporarily disappear.  We had been waiting our entire adult lives for this day, and I wasn’t about to take it for granted.

Finally, they day came. The Time Warner man came and graced us with cable.  I was so excited to come home from work that day, I could barely stand it.  Cody went back to work after the installation, but left a note next to the remote: “just press the power button!!!” Bless his heart.  I held my breath and turned on the TV, but I was immediately faced with an internal battle I didn’t see coming…I couldn’t decide what to watch.

photo credit: Cody Kinart
photo credit: Cody Kinart

Instead of having the option of watching one terrible local news program or another even more terrible local news program, I was now presented with an UNBELIEVABLE amount of options.  I could watch a talk show, or maybe a classic comedy….or how about a show strictly consisting of grown men arm wrestling?  The anxiety behind making the right choice was crippling.  What if I started to watch Bridesmaids, but unbeknownst to me, I was completely missing True Life: I”m an Internet Celebrity?  The potential for failure was high.

I also had a lot of questions after viewing a few programs for the first time.  How can the Kardashians be real people?  Why does HBO still play movies like Big Daddy?  If I watch four straight hours of Hoarders, will I become a hoarder myself?

It’s been a few weeks now, and Cody and I are slowly starting to adapt to our new found TV freedom.  We sometimes have to make sacrifices for each other – I let him watch the fishing channel if he will sit through an episode of Say Yes to the Dress with me.  I’ve also found a solution for my anxiety over missing out on television shows : DVR.  I’ve yet to try it, but once I do, you better believe I will be recording every episode of Property Brothers, even though it’s on 24 hours a day anyway.

 

Photo Credit: Cody Kinart
Photo Credit: Cody Kinart

Savanah was born and reluctantly raised in Wisconsin (just kidding, Milwaukee’s not that bad).  She’s a project manager by day, but will never be able to completely let go of her coffee roots.  She is mom to puppy Hannah, partner to Cody, and enjoys pancakes, and Will Smith movies. Want to read more?  She blogs about mental health here.

 

What are your television show vices?

 

2 comments

  1. This could have been written about Jordan and I! We also recently got cable, and replace a fishing show with sports, its identical. Yay for being grown ups with cable!

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